I am well aware of the fact of one's own inner drive to survive. Even if all conditions speak against it, you feel horrible pain, still it wants to get by, even if the situation is something that indicates "there is no way out here". Nothing harder there is than surrendering to death - or even executing that idea to take that into your own hand. So I can imagine for myself, even if your whole body is burned, your skin melts off your bones and you're indeed only a half torso with a head and an arm - still you cling to live instinctively and try to go on living, from that situation. So I really don't want to judge what is worse in that situation - trying to survive as half a portion of a human or knowing your air runs out, supplies run out and you gonna starve sooner or later in a few days/weeks. Saying... despair can drive you up the walls. Despair lets you eat things which you know make you sick, despair even lets you forget about radiation or contamination if it lets you breathe and fill your stomach. It lets you forget about the cancer that comes in only a few days, it lets you forget about all your hesitations and your logic thinking in a blow, if it can only satisfy those basic needs. Your brain isn't even interested in if those actions will kill you, although your mind knew that before firmly.
I won't say this is very comfortable either... When your inner drive to survive goes havoc and won't accept its fate, even though every resistance is futile.
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Date: 13 March 2018 09:48 am (UTC)So I can imagine for myself, even if your whole body is burned, your skin melts off your bones and you're indeed only a half torso with a head and an arm - still you cling to live instinctively and try to go on living, from that situation.
So I really don't want to judge what is worse in that situation - trying to survive as half a portion of a human or knowing your air runs out, supplies run out and you gonna starve sooner or later in a few days/weeks.
Saying... despair can drive you up the walls. Despair lets you eat things which you know make you sick, despair even lets you forget about radiation or contamination if it lets you breathe and fill your stomach.
It lets you forget about the cancer that comes in only a few days, it lets you forget about all your hesitations and your logic thinking in a blow, if it can only satisfy those basic needs.
Your brain isn't even interested in if those actions will kill you, although your mind knew that before firmly.
I won't say this is very comfortable either... When your inner drive to survive goes havoc and won't accept its fate, even though every resistance is futile.